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The problem that she has found with abstinence pledges is that teens have misconceptions about what it means to be a virgin.“Teen girls don’t understand what virginity is,” Di Marco says, “so everything except intercourse is considered okay even by Christian girls.” These behaviors can include everything from deep kissing and heavy petting to oral sex.Rather than telling teens exactly how far is too far, Di Marco points them to Jesus’ teaching that if a man merely looks at a woman lustfully, he has already committed adultery in his heart.Di Marco tells teens, “If what you are doing is going to in any way lead one of you to think about sexual thoughts, then you have gone too far because what you are thinking in your mind is what you are going to be accountable for.” For parents who discover that their teen has been sexually active, it is important to handle the situation in a healthy way.
In her book, she writes candidly about the physical and emotional dangers associated with sexual behaviors as well as what God’s Word says about where couples should “draw the line” concerning physical behaviors in their relationships.
t used to be that most parents didn’t worry that their children would fall into sexual temptation until after they were old enough to drive.
Having a car potentially gave them plenty of alone time with a member of the opposite sex, and that was cause for concern.
The solution, she said, is for parents and youth pastors to take a more active role in teaching teens God’s standards and design for sex.
This often means learning the slang terms that teens use for sexual acts and being willing to broach uncomfortable topics.